Abe Froman sent me this , I hope Kayden takes it in the spirit in which it’s posted because it is HILARIOUS, and so perfectly true.

This video is basically us headed out, looks a lot faster than we were really going….about 26 knots note how calm the seas were.  We also got lucky in that the day was cloudy all day, high clouds with no rain it kept us from one of those scorchers.

Next clip we get to where we fish and Hunter tangles with a 7+ foot Dusky Shark

Would you take a swim there?  We did

By Kayden Kross

I got invited to a Thai barbeque awhile back by a friend who was going to be in town for it and didn’t want to go alone. I couldn’t imagine why one would fly in for a barbeque but I didn’t ask, and frankly I just relished the idea of home made Thai food cooked to order right in front of me by a real live Thai woman. That was weeks ago and today I had my barbeque.

OK. So there was a barbeque and a Thai woman. The problem was she was cooking steak and potato salad and I wanted Pad Thai and chicken satay. What made up for it was the nature of the barbeque. This friend works with special interest groups in Sacramento and it turns out this was a work function for him and a reunion for the rest of the attendees. What did they all have in common? They had served time as “lifers”. I was at an annual murderer’s reunion.

You wouldn’t have known it from the outside and only barely from the inside, not that there is a standard way of picking murderer’s reunions out of a mix. There was a blow up bounce house powered by generator on the front lawn. Little girls in pigtails and boys in striped shirts with primary colors were squealing and shouting and chasing each other in circles with exaggerated astronaut jumps. Couples came in two by two with fruit pies and salads and you could hear the sound of a guitar drifting from somewhere behind the house. It was a two story with a two-car garage in suburbia, USA.

What gave it away in the backyard was that people were segregated like a prison yard with one race in each corner except near the grill with the Thai woman who wasn’t serving Thai. There were a lot of cowboy hats and ankle monitors and faded tattoos but these things together or apart don’t say murderer. Nothing said murderer. These are people who say hi to you at crosswalks and leave their change in tip jars and lean down to pet your dog and ask his name or give him a treat. They were nice. They introduced me to their wives and friends and kids and offered me more steak more chicken and more pie. “Eat!” they said. As I stood there sipping on a wine cooler and denying myself cake a rabbit hopped out of the bushes and started soliciting treats from strangers. Wives went crazy and took pictures and more kids squealed. The lady next to me told me the story of ‘Rodent’ the rabbit. Rodent had been found half alive on the side of a running trail by one of the murderers. That was four years ago. Ok so I had one common interest with the host of the party, a man who had put a hit out on his wife and served 24 years. We both like taking home stray rabbits. Perhaps it’s as emotionally extreme to take a life as it is to save one. Or maybe we’re all just trying to make amends.

There are things that politicians can rely on. The first is that they can never appear too tough on crime. It’s bad business for an opponent to argue against it. Same with porn. You can never make America too safe ‘for the children’. There is a small group of people though who have recognized that politicians use their tough crime stance to ride into office at the expense of the rights of people who have admittedly fucked up in a big way but have put in their time with no end in sight. Take the reverend, for example, who came home to find his wife in bed with not one, but two other men. He shot her. And him. And him. Crimes of passion, mostly against spouses. That’s what the majority of these guys were in for. Something snapped and they’ll pay for it for the rest of their lives. On the way in I asked how I would know who was a murderer and who was an advocate. He told me to look for the guys with the biggest egos and a strong sense of entitlement. I read that in a text book somewhere once before.

What you don’t read in textbooks is how remarkable it is to be in the presence of someone who is externally grateful just to be. To be eating steak off a barbeque (even if it’s not Thai steak). To be catching up with friends. There was a certain sincerity in introductions that you don’t see very often. It was not just a formality and the jokes were not made for show. And the chivalry. These lifers presented their wives to me like they were unveiling masterpieces. “This is my beautiful wife so-and-so.” They said it as if they almost didn’t believe it themselves. “This is my second chance.”

They talked politics mostly, about the uneven handling of cases and parole hearings that are held or not held in contempt of court. I picked up a publication that they run called the “California Lifer Newsletter”. It’s a long list of status reports on cases they’re trying to help fight from the outside as well as a rundown of corrupt activity within the system- commissioners who they’ve successfully forced out for unethical behavior, guards misfiring grenades, wardens in direct violation of various anti-restraint policies and finally a grim warning to stop buying cell phones off guards if you ever expect to make it out. Then there was a chart showing the ratio of parole hearings to grants. Some years it’s zero. Or 6 out of 296 cases heard. Or 12 out of 469. They print a table for individual prisons. These men are passionate about their cause. I just showed up for some spicy food but they’re here because they see how they can help the people who still haven’t made it out of a system that is stacked against them. At the end of the day they lined up for a group photo with their cowboy hats and ankle monitors and tattoos and freedom and smiled to the word cheese while their family and friends and supporters looked on. They take this picture every year and send it out to the prisons. The man sitting in front row center seat holds a hand printed sign that offers a “toast and a prayer from all of us lifers on the outside to all of those we left behind.”

By Kayden Kross (via email for the dumb fuck who thinks that because I post these I write them…Kayden writes much better than I do)

So I’m sitting in a hotel room. I’m sore and I’m antsy for two separate reasons mostly related to planes and uprooted sleep schedules. I’ve had four cosmos, at least, but probably more, and the AC cannot battle the humidity any better than the windowpanes can battle the sound of the crickets outside who bark, not chirp.

I spent some time poking around the internet. I got a blog posted that was not well written but got the story across and that was all the energy and/or coherence I could muster. I don’t want to open my book because it’s a good one and not meant to be wasted on times like these, where I will absorb nothing but remember just enough to not want to reread it. It’s a book based on free, on a free economy and how to monetize free. It says free is not going away and I believe it based on countless tube sites who have transformed our industry by giving away stolen content for—you guessed it—free. If it were a Tom Clancy novel though I’d tear through it right now without remorse. I hate him and everything his crap stands for and I like the idea of reading and forgetting it like a cheap whore. Danielle Steel too. If I had a dictatorship there would be book burnings, and anything sold in grocery stores would be at risk. I’d call it “Quality Control”. It has the ring of propaganda to it.

It’s funny what you end up thinking about when you have no deadlines or things to pass dead time. I caught up on Mike’s blog, where Julie Meadows posted a response to a question asked long ago about why us girls end up with those losers. The pimp and ho phenomenon. The bad boyfriends. We’ve all had them.

I can’t say I’ve never had one. I have and he trumps most of the stories I’ve heard. How did I end up with him? Simple. I didn’t know I was dating him. He lied. About his past, his future, his age, his job, his finances. The person I thought I was dating was completely different. And after I figured it out—on his birthday (“I’m sorry baby, I forgot what year I was born” (I’m offended that he thought that one would get by me)), it was absolute hell getting rid of him. Suddenly he had a history of domestic violence, and a history of bumming off of people, and an unstable relationship with alcohol and a whole host of other bigger issues that magically appeared overnight. I still deal with the aftermath of having dated him. You don’t realize how serious a serious relationship is until you meet the person who would use it against you.

But everyone since him has been wonderful. I can’t say I have a history of dating losers. I think these things get blown out of proportion. Nine girls can date great guys and sustain drama free relationships and then you get the one who can’t and you’ve got a story and it propels the stereotype. It seems like we go through life always hearing about but never actually meeting this enormous fleet of psycho exes who are out there running around, lurking in the shadows waiting to key your car or check your phone and run crying to your mother. My theory is that we all get a little psycho in a bad relationship, we all do the things we would never think to do to a close friend or family member. But we’d do it to the person we love most passionately. It’s backwards and horrible but it happens again and again.

Bad relationships and crazy relationships and parasitic relationships are not unique to our little industry. We are just especially keen on airing our dirty laundry and we’ve been catapulted into an especially uneven earning bracket with all other things held equal. We’re a bunch of girls dating the guys were dating before we started making money. The higher earner always seems to give a little support to the lower earner in relationships and men have traditionally held that role. Why would you expect any different in porn, where for once the chicks aren’t banging their palms against a glass ceiling and making 70 cents to a man’s dollar? As for crazy, we date the people we have chemistry with, or at least we try to. What is chemistry other than a magical connection you feel with another person who can fill in the missing parts just right. Don’t you remember high school science with the atoms floating around looking for that other half, the extra electrons to scoop up or the buddy atom who was also missing a few electrons and they would team up because together they were stable. They form a bond. That’s chemistry and when you find it you don’t want to let it go. It can make you crazy and people went crazy and cheated and freeloaded in relationships long before porn and strip clubs came along. Maybe next week we’ll talk about one of the other thousands of things that people sometimes deal with in life that is also not the fault of porn.

The thing is, when I first heard about this I thought that I recognized the con, it was common enough and anyone who read a paper or watched the news heard about it, and what makes it even more interesting is President Obama is now proposing the federal government do the EXACT same thing.

What happens is pretty standard, a mortgage broker or someone working with a mortgage broker looks for someone with a distressed property, someone about to be foreclosed on.  They are easy to find because foreclosures have to be published before hand.  Then they had to find someone with a little cash and good credit to sell the idea to.

The idea being that the purchaser can save the property from foreclosure by buying it from the owner.  The owner then rents the property from the new buyer, often the agreement would be to sell it back or make it a lease purchase or some other deal. It’s sold as a can’t lose because of the way property prices were skyrocketing.

The mortgage broker gets a nice commission on the sale, then often convinces the new purchaser to refinance the property   sometimes for even more than it is worth, again making a nice commission.

The broker may also be the one who collects the rent from the original owner, all for a fee of course…and that rent often never made it’s way to the new owner.

So now that you understand that, lets look at what happened here.  Kayden purchases the home but never gets the required rent, either because the broker kept it  or because the initial problem that the homeowner wasnt making his payments was still a problem.  So she cant keep up with it and the plummeting housing prices and market forcing the house  into foreclosure.

So initially it looks like she might be a bad guy and gets charged with a felony…that is until the prosecutor sees her records and the fact that the rent payments werent made…her felony charge gets dropped, she didn’t profit from the transaction, matter of fact, she lost money and she has the IRS audit along with all the documentation from that year to prove it.

So who is still charged with a felony?  The brokers…you figure it out.

Kayden gets a misdemeanor for not having a rental contract with the homeowner.

So Kayden, it wasn’t hard to support you, I knew what had happened, what was hard was keeping quiet about it so as not to jeopardize your case. It’s all over now and it’s behind you.

People who read this will understand now, it wont change the mind of some of them but it certainly should be understandable by anyone who can read a paper.

What really concerns me is now Obama is proposing that the federal government buy properties in foreclosure and rent them back to the owners…..

Does this sound familiar?

There has been some speculation that Kayden Kross and myself have had some sort of falling out, this was apparently going on for a while and was fueled when I announced that she was no longer writing here.

Allow me to clarify, once and for all.

I don’t speak for Kayden but I know it’s safe to say that there has been no falling out or parting of the ways. Kayden is one of my dearest friends, I consider her to be family. We talk daily and we share interests other than the industry.

I hated losing her as a contributor here but I also understand that she is very busy and the she feels the need to write posts that she spend hours composing, because she wants it to be the best that she can produce.  Me on the other hand I write off the cuff, and can compose a post pretty much linearly in just a few minutes. In re reading it my I dont need you then response to her does sound kind of mean…it certainly wasnt meant to.

So when she says she doesn’t have time I can see that and there is no ill will or whatever on my part.  This blog is a business, I have to maintain it as such, I owe that to my readers.

Kayden honey, I love ya to death and wish you only the best. Anytime you wish to write something and send it tome for publication here it will be a welcome addition to this site, but there is no obligation for you to do so.

This time she trips up David  Spade in “Rules of Engagment” on CBS

KAYDEN KROSS TO APPEAR ON “CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION” TONIGHT!

Adam & Eve exclusive contract star Kayden Kross is scheduled to appear on tonight’s episode of “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation” on CBS Television (airing at 9 p.m. ET, on Thursday, April 16).

Titled “A Space Oddity,” this episode, set in Las Vegas, features Kayden in a non-speaking role at a science fiction convention, where someone inevitably ends up murdered.

“We shot this episode in February,” says Kayden, who has starred in such Adam & Eve titles as “Kayden’s Frisky Business” and “Kayden Exposed.”

“I play a science fiction fan at the convention who is painted blue,” she continues. “I spent the entire day wearing only blue body paint! It was a lot of fun to do, and the cast was very warm and generous… although I don’t think they know about my day job!”

Starring entertainment industry giants Marg Helgenberger and Laurence Fishburne, “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation” is an award-winning crime drama network series trailing the investigations of a group of Las Vegas forensic scientists.

Kayden has appeared in numerous mainstream television shows including “Gene Simmons Family Jewels,” but she won’t be watching herself tonight on “CSI.”

“I’m co-hosting the XRCO Awards tonight with Jessica Drake,” Kayden laughs. “But I do have my TiVo set to record it!”

I have been working closely with Kayden for almost two years now and I have mentioned this story before.

But I got an email from a reader today and she wanted to know my best Kayden Kross Story….well here it is

I had the pleasure of taking the lovely and talented Kayden Kross  to dinner last Friday evening. It was our first time ever meeting face to face.  We had spent many hours on the phone but this was well….sort of a first date.  Now Kayden just doesn’t automagically give you her respect, you have to prove yourself to her and over the course of a year I had.  I could tell at first she was a tad uneasy, that was to be expected, but when our conversation centered on books, writers, politics and such she loosened up quickly, I didn’t bambard her with sexual innuendo and double entendres and dumb shit like that, I treated her like my friend, which she was, and still is.

I have a little place in Hollywood beach where the seafood is very fresh and the atmosphere is like I like….a hole in the wall. It’s called Nicks on the Beach in Hollywood Beach. FL. So that’s where we went.

As we peruse the menu I ask this young lady If she knows what she wants for dinner. She responds that she is leaning towards fish. I suggest either the Dolphin or the Grouper as they are both indigenous and locally caught, ensuring freshness.

She is from California, naturally and is quite the animal lover, owning horses and having worked in the past at Petco, I even knew she started stripping to get enough money to save a horse from slaughter.

She seems a tad uneasy as she says; “I’m not really a vegetarian but I just couldn’t eat Dolphin.”

At first I’m a bit perplexed, then it occurs to me that she thinks they are serving “Flipper”, in other words dolphin the mammal not dolphin the fish.

Now picture this…she positively has to be appalled, and she is probably thinking that this person that she has decided to trust and respect must be some sort of monster… I mean dolphin the mammals are generally considered more intelligent than most Californians and here she is sure that I am sufggesting that she eat one.

But she is holding it together, partially out of giving me the benefit of the doubt I think and partially out of the idea that maybe people in Florida really do eat dolphin the mammals.

It crosses my mind to fuck with her, but I resist and explain to her that it’s not Flipper but what she might know better as Mahi Mahi or Dorado.

Dolphin The Fish

She ended up ordering it.I have to hand it to her though, she maintained her composure very well for someone who had to be APPALLED that people would eat Flipper.

As expected Pirates 2 cleaned house, even Jewn hissownself accepted an award in a cowboy hat and sunglasses

Some surprises were that Kayden was shut out, but we know she is a winner. Sasha Grey was also shut out and truth is I like Katie Morgan But Sasha should have won the crossover award…I mean ya she played a hooker but she was the FEMALE LEAD in a movie made by an Academy Award winning director.

Adam and Eve was shut out pretty much, I love them to death but they really need some solid directors over there. They really should own the Best Movie category.

Congrats to all the winners!