I dont want to take away anything from anyone who has to sit in a federal courtroom, as a defendant, in this biz but to put 5 Star Video and J.M. Productions in the same class with Rondee Kamins is just wrong.

What Rondee did for this business, with no help from the self aggrandizing retards at the Free Speech Coalition, who didn’t so much as file an Amicus Brief, was a stellar accomplishment.

She took on 2257, with her own money, and she WON, and she won big for the entire industry. She never once whined about how she needed more money to accomplish this, she didn’t win it only for members of GVA Cleveland, she went out and did what was right and we all benefitted.

Not just porn but everyone in this country.  2257 was probably the single most egregious attack that our government has attempted to perpetrate on our constitutional rights to free speech, freedom from illegal search and seizure and due process.

We all owe Rondee a debt of gratitude and she should stand alone for her outstanding valor in standing up to our government for what is right.

Now what do you want to bet that when presented with this award the presenter will be some flunky from the worthless Free Speech Coalition who will continue to try to glom on to her success.

I can hear here it now:

“To present the Reuben Sturman Award we now present Jeffery Douglas”

Who will in turn say:

“For her efforts in continuing the work of the Free Speech Coalition….”

God I could just vomit thinking about this.

I looked over the nominees for best movie, most of which I have seen. My guess is the most deserving is NOT the movie that will win, as is usually the case.

How anything on the list of nominees can even be considered in the same genre as “Black Worm” is way beyond me.

The first thing you say when you see “Black Worm” is Whoa…the production values here are WAY too good to be porn.  This movie made the best of the last 20 year, including, “Corruption” and “Pirates” look like rejects from “HBO Real Sex”.  My first reaction was hey…someone associated with these guys has REAL mainstream connections and talent.

The story stands by itself, not since “Dixie Ray, Hollywood Star” and “Cafe Flesh” have we seen a story that can stand on it’s own with no sex at all, and there are no cheap parlor tricks in this, no gaping assholes, no ass to mouth, no chopsticks or whatever, just good solid sex that is erotic without detracting too much from the story.

“Black Worm” got stellar reviews and everyone noted it’s slick, totally professional look, but my bet is that it will loose the awards that it most deserves (Best Movie, Best Director etc) to someone with little or no real talent but a much larger advertising and PR Budget.

This one jumped out at me from the start, never mind that it is condescending to the person who wins it but should it really bear Jenna’s name? Instead of say Ron Jeremy’s?

I’m not taking away anything from Jenna, she has done well for herself but the real question in my mind is who has done more in mainstreaming the industry? Ronnie hs been a friend to the biz for longer than Jenna has even been alive. Ron has had  parts in a LOT of mainstream movies, enough to have his SAG Card, and he has helped a LOT of other porners get into mainstream and to get SAG Cards.

Ron is universally recognized and has been an intelligent spokesperson for the industry, he is always gracious with fans and consistently signs more autographs at trade shows than anyone else.

But even at that why attach a name to it at all, I mean how would, say Stormy Daniels feel should she win this award (which she deserves IMHO) Will it seem to her that her accomplishments in mainstream somehow don’t live up to Jenna’s? Particularly when it could be argued that Stormy or even Jesse Jane have done a far better job of representing the industry professionally?

Does this mean AVN will give Jenna a say so in who receives the award with her name on it?

This ones just a bad move no matter how I look at it.

After looking them over pretty good I noticed some things, some injustices, some glaring ommisions and some just plain old observations. Now don’t get me wrong, these are AVNs Awards and they can do whatever they want with em, but in the coming posts I’m gonna be offering MY thoughts…Yup they are mine and I’m entitled to em and AVN can listen or disregard em.

All I really wanna know is what YOU think. Am I way out of touch?

I have had this story for a while but didn’t run it because the girls disappearance was a big story and nobody was mentioning that she had an adult site. Out of respect to her family and friends who may or may not have known I decided it was irrelevant.

Well today the story broke on the newswires  and the local police fell all overthemselves trying to imply theres a tie-in with her adult work and her disappearance.

Not the case I’m told.  She was last seen leaving a bar with a hispanic male and his girlfriend, when police showed up at the man’s hotel room it was in disarray and there were signs of a violent struggle, including blood.

She hasn’t been found or heard from and theres a nationwide manhunt for the perpetrator, one Israel Mireles, 24 years old. Last seen Near Wichita, KS

This is a sad story and it serious and for local asshat politicians to say things like this:

El Dorado Police Chief Tom Boren said FBI and state experts on Internet crime have been called in.

“Investigators are aware that Miss Sander was apparently involved in a Web site situation,” he said. “Allegations that this may factor into her disappearance are being thoroughly investigated.”

is inflammatory and flat out irresponsible, they know that Isreal Mirelis nor his 16 year old girlfriend have any connection to the adult community.

As far as calling Zoey Zane a “pornstar” that’s quite a stretch, she simply had her own website in the works and on hearing the news of her disappearance her webmaster took everything down in hopes that nobody would make the connection making a bad situation worse for her family.

So the way I see it here the adult webmaster did the right thing and the El Dorado Police Chief if nothing but piece of shit lowlife who is using this to paint it as though she somehoe got what she deserved.

Fuck him and anyone else who has that attitude.

As everyone around Atlanta is aware, the newly formed city of John’s Creek, GA, a suburb of Atlanta, has been at war with a local adult store called “The Love Shack”. Well the Love Shack has survived and made money at that store for one year and a celebration will be held on December 15.

How’s that involve me? Glad you asked

One of the things John’s Creek is in bad need of is a Fire Department. John Cornetta, decided to put away his differences with the city and help raise money for this fire department, he challeneged the City Mayor, an inept politician named Mike Bodker to join him in a dunk tank, Bodker not so politely declined.

Enter me. Never one to turn down the opportunity to whore for myself or a good cause I volunteered to “sit in” for Bodker. So in the cold December weather my dumb ass will be sitting in a dunk tank alonside of Cornetta’s dumb ass getting dunked into the cold water all in the name of helping a town I don’t even live in get a fire department. A town that probably wouldn’t let me live there even if I was rich enough…and I’m not.

I’m pretty sure John doesn’t live there either, but at least he has a store there and he does have enough to live there, matter of fact I think John’s Creek is a slum compared to where John lives.
So Adella, here’s your chance to take out a little frustration on me….join like minded people like my ex wives and girlfriends and throw baseballs at me and John. It’s all for a good cause.

And if anyone likes me please come out and dunk the godless heathen next to me in that tank…it’s gonna suck if I get all the action…

You can read them all HERE

Congrats to all the nominees

OK I know this is a tad late because it would have been useful at Thanksgiving. But Christmas is right around the corner so please bear this in mind.

Most of us spend the Holidays with our families, Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas, New Years Eve, even Easter. On one, two or more of these days you will find yourself about to sit down to the family feast with your relatives and inlaws and the rest of the people you avoid seeing except for on these special ocassions.

And what is it that happens just before you begin to eat? No I don’t mean the “blessing” I mean the idiot with the camera who says;

“Wait! Let me get a picture!”

Ah yes, while the food is getting colder by the moment This Leonardo DaVinci thiks the moment should be immortalized on film so that everyone can remember what it looked like.

Well I don’t know about y’all but the ones I have to attend look pretty much the same as they did the year before, and the year before that….and so on.

They take the photos (It’s never just one) and they pass around the camera….

“Ohhhh, look at grampy, doesn’t he look nice?”

Well I don’t know about y’alls but the sumbitch looked hungry to me.

Now I know it’s probably the only time that everyone there is together and nobody is arguing with anyone else over what college football team is superior or whatever but you simply MUST resist the temptation.

Take your photos before the meal, while people are still rather happy and not bloated from eating too much, believe me you may thinks it’s tradition but the only thing the people around that table are traditionally doing is fighting the urge to take your camera and but it into a place where you won’t retrieve it without some degree of discomfort.

Remember there has only been ONE GOOD PICTURE of people eating in the entire history of  mankind.

And you ain’t Leonardo DaVinci.

When I was a kid I used to watch the orginal “Hollywood Squares”

These great questions and answers are from the days when “Hollywood Squares” game show responses were spontaneous and clever not scripted and (often) dull, as they are now.

Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you’re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me a wake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitain, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he’s married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say “I Love You”?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are “Do It,” “I Can Help,” and “I Can’t Get Enough ” ?
A. George Gobel: I don’t know, but it’s coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I’ll give you a gesture you’ ll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell’s Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you’ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I’m too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what’s a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I’m always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn’t neglected.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I’ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.

I hope you are all with those that you love and those that love you.