You are currently browsing comments. If you would like to return to the full story, you can read the full entry here: “50 Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex ”.
|
|
50 Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex29 comments to 50 Mistakes Women Make When Having SexYou must be logged in to post a comment. |
   |
|
Copyright © 2012 MikeSouth.Com - All Rights Reserved |
||
Expecting him to undress you. I put a bra on almost every day. I know for a fact that getting them off isn’t always easy. Help a brother out.
Ok, why is this guy putting on a bra every day?
BTW, this guy needs to load up on hand cream and tissues if he has all these bitches against bitches.
Women really do all thats stuff? Thank you, Goddess, for bringing up the bra thing! I thought I was reading it wrong. Ha!
Maybe he's a drag queen:)
actually i think azoy is a SHE not a he
making it even more entertaining
Well, great, then maybe she can make a list of what HE'S not supposed to bring to the table.
She can also tell us why it's ok for a guy to shove your head down onto his cock because you're not doing it right, but a woman is supposed to SAY what she wants in bed. Guys aren't capable of verbalizing what they want?
Goddess! You're funny.
Maybe dating should require a contract and a pamphlet for notes-referral before the date so no one does anything they shouldn't do and is bound to do everything they should do. Cock-gagging, reverse-cowgirl-riding and severe non-cuddling tactics at the very end... maybe that even results... in murder. That's hot. j/k
Oh, and there should be a clause that if you're a paraplegic female, you must supply the ceiling attachments to hold and bounce you on his (or her) penis so that you are still doing your fair share of the boinking exercise.
Clever!
Im digging the estrogen v. testosterone clash going on here...
Goddess yer a riot wait till you read the decadent shit Im doing HERE LOL
OK its not really decadent but trust me its a different mentality
wheres here you ask...you will find out soon
No, my point is that she thinks women should speak up in the bedroom, but I guess we're supposed to ASSume shoving our heads down on their cocks is the male universal action for "I'm not happy with the way you're sucking my cock"? Puhleeze. Guys can speak up too. Hell if they can ask for a threesome, they can tell you how they want their cocks sucked.
I'm thinking this chick must be a real laugh riot in bed....you know, once she's finished reading all the "do's" and "don'ts" of sex with her. Julie's contract idea is probably a better one. Spell out everything in plain English:).
Wherever it is, it can't be holding your interest too strongly, South, or you'd be out enjoying yourself instead of writing for your site;)
Well, I think it's very entertaining, but seriously, if he/she knows fifty things that can go wrong during sex, he/she might want to set his/her standards a bit higher. Sounds like he/she screws anything that moves!
"44. Not washing before sex." - Who doesn't wash before sex?? Ew!!!
I'm sooooo glad I don't date anymore!!! When you've been married long enough, you can say things like, "Rinse it off in the sink, honey. We need to do this NOW!" Ha!
LOL! I agree, Julie. For a minute, I was wondering why she even bothers to have sex after dealing with all that.
And it's so nice to hear other married couples say the same sorts of things we do;) When I read #16, I was thinking this person can't be in a long term relationship because you DO know what the other person wants by the noises they make. Sexual shorthand;)
This HAD to be written by a woman. No way in hell I could remember 50 things not to do while having sex. And I sure don't want my partner going over this list in her head while I'm attempting to give her the best 45 seconds of her life (or mine, maybe)!
HOWEVER, I would like for every woman who reads this (especially if there's even a snowball's chance in hell that we'll ever have a sexual encounter) to commit #45 to conscious and sub-conscious memory. PLEASE !!!
Guess we should have known it was written by a woman by the wordiness.
I have a question, though. Does any woman over the age of 25 even READ Cosmo? It's such a lameass mag.
This reminds me of Antioch College in Yellow Springs (what a name - sounds like a Euro DVD title!), Ohio (former home of Dick Freeman - have fun with that one, Goddess!) where not that long ago they actually came out with a student guideline where both the males and females were REQUIRED, when potentially getting intimate, to verbally ASK their partner whether it was ok to do this-and-that (sexually) and ONLY do it step by step. It got so bad that Freeman, in his own home, was once overheard muttering to his better half (who is interestingly enough - a TEACHER on the college grounds!) things like "is it OK to take out the garbage now" or "should I set the table for dinner" or "can I review this perverted DVD now"...
Now, if SOUTH was in Yellow Springs I can hear it now - questions like: "Hey Bitch, is it OK for these dozen guys to splooge on your face as long as they don't get it up your nose?"...
you guys are cracking me up...and goddess....ya i shouldnt be updating but I have to...but just wait till you read about what I have done the last three days and will be doing the next 27, my life has already been permanently changed. Its amazing
LMFAO! Hunter: "HOWEVER, I would like for every woman who reads this (especially if there’s even a snowball’s chance in hell that we’ll ever have a sexual encounter) to commit #45 to conscious and sub-conscious memory. PLEASE !!!"
There's no chance, after your definitive exclamation, that some woman, somewhere, won't want to violate your manly parts.. I promise. That statement you made, Hunter, is like an open invitation to excavate as frequently as possible. This whole damn blog has been an incredible source of enjoyment for me. Goddess, please post your comments more! You are damn funny, woman!
Oh, and #46...? I know gay men that won't spew on 500 count ( and more - no less) cotton Egyptian sheets, no matter how absolutely sex-tasctic the guy is... and if they don't go for it, baby...I don't , either!
Hmm hard to imagine what you HAVEN'T done, Mr. Sex on a Turtle's Back. And hard to imagine what you'd WANT to do for 30 days in a row. I'm guessing you're not learning from a Zen Master, so I'm thinking one of those live sex shows over in Amsterdam or wherever. Cuz dang if you're in Brazil....sigh.
Ah shoot! I misread #45. Sorry Hunter. I was rather impressed with my misread after five Sierra Nevadas.
The butt can be such a lovely place.
While reading this, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry....Dear Lord, how on earth are you meant to have sex if you have to think of all these things?
)
This is like the ten commandments for sex or something... Or should that be 50 commandments for sex. It's worse than that magazine 'Cosmo'!
Noone is perfect, noone is the most spectacular person in bed, we all have different likes and dislikes, some of us (like myself) even choose not to have sex at all at this moment in time for one reason or another.(uh oh, better cart me off to the mental asylum...how loopy am I? LOL) Sorry, slight sarcasm there.:)
It should never be taken as seriously as this folks..As long as noone is getting emotionally or physically hurt,and people are respectful and honest with each other, I say fuck these rules and just..well,... fuck! ;0)Do whatever feels right for you.
Okay, I actually had to google "Sierra Nevada". I figure there can't be five mountain ranges or colleges. So I've made a mental note, "never be naked in the same room with Julie and alcohol" *SMILE*
Dear Lord, how on earth are you meant to have sex if you have to think of all these things?
)
Angel, it sounds like she's thinking of them while she's having sex...LOL!
LMAO! It is true, it is true.
He/she could be a hermaphrodite... That would explain the need to shove a female head upon the penis while wearing a bra.
Great piece! Though I don't agree with them all, it's nice to read the other side of the coin. I rate this piece "Slap Happy". Makes you want to slap your forehead and yell "D'OH!", want to slap your knee and laugh out loud, and want to slap your girl and yell, "BITCH!".
"He/she could be a hermaphrodite… "
Oh, Julie!!! This thread is like an avalanche, just keeps going downhill! I'm going to go help Lady H and Goddess search for Waldo South.
I think the writer of this article forgot one.
I read a Dear Abby column recently in which a guy was waiting for his wife to come out of the shower so they could have sex. When he went in to see what was taking so long, he found her scrubbing the grout.
So "no scrubbing the grout while your man is waiting to get laid!" Of course that might be an excellent time to get him to commit to a bathroom remodel...